By Elma Gabriel
It is interesting how the impact of one situation, as in the case of the saga of Yugge Farrell and SVG Minister of Finance, Camillo Gonsalves, has only created much contempt within an already divided society. However, contrary to either opinion, this situation has brought to light a pattern of disregard and betrayal not only felt by the less privileged Farrell family but to persons everywhere.
So, what makes this incident differ from many similar extramarital escapades of the past? Can anyone provide any justification as to “Why Can’t Vincy Women make the grade as First Lady?”. The reality is that history has disclosed a pattern where our men, especially those in top leadership positions of SVG Government, see no drawback in having affairs and children with our Vincy women but inexcusably pick their brides from another country.
These men are our brothers, fathers, uncles. My people, the time has come to confront this matter; the continuous disrespect to our women must stop. Let’s start with Ebenezer T. Joshua, whose wife Icy Joshua was a Grenadian national, Milton Cato whose wife, Lucy Alexander-Cato, was non-Vincentian, and also Sir James Fitz-Allen Mitchell whose wife is Canadian.
Dr. Ralph Gonsalves married twice, first a Jamaican and then a Dominican.
Who knows who will replace Dr. Gonsalves as the next leader of the country, but as the current situation has illustrated, the Leader of the Opposition’s wife is a Canadian, therefore, already the blueprint should the NDP becomes the leading party. Consider also should Camillo Gonsalves, whose wife is Jamaican, succeeds his father?
So, tell me my heritage sisters and brothers, why can’t vincy women make the grade as first lady?
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The opinions presented in this content belong to the author and may not necessarily reflect the perspectives or editorial stance of iWitness News. Opinion pieces can be submitted to [email protected].
Elma have you ever walked a neibourhood and listened to the mouths on Vincentian women. What is known as the fishwife mouth. Most Vincentian men if given the opportunity will choose a woman without the fishwife mouth.
But having said that they don’t mind using them to practice on, keeping the best at home for Sundays and entertaining.
I believe the correct term is “fishmonger’s daughter” which in Shakespearian times (as in Hamlet) referred to a prostitute. Perhaps this was transposed in SVG to “fishwife mouth” which could also refer to paid oral sex.
Also, Elma does not have any awareness of the negative effects of inbreeding, given that most Vincies “suck from the same bubbie,” meaning that they are related by blood.
She also fails to realize how many Vincentian migrants have married people from other countries. Each of these men spent considerable time overseas where they met their wives.
Also, marrying out, especially for men, means marrying someone without a past, meaning that all her pre-marital philandering would not be known to local people (and perhaps not even to her spouse).
I didn’t know that one of the criterion of marriage was “place of birth” ????
Has any one of these wives done anything immoral, illegal etc? Have you quite wrongfully highlighted them and forced them to wear a scarlet letter based solely that they are non Vincentians? Or havent you realized the implications and inferences that can be drawn from your “opinion”?
Its truly a sad day when a woman can write an article like this where other women are judged who have done nothing known, other than the fact that they are non- Vincentian wives.
The saying that a woman is another woman’s worse enemy is echoed through this utter nonesense.
Shame on you.
“Shame on you” is far too soft a rebuke for this s**t-hole essay.
I RESTATE THE QUESTION>>>>>”why cant >>>>VINCY WOMEN <<<<<make the grade as first lady?"
Persons are FREE and welcome to 'marriage who they wish and so are we FREE to our "OPINION" Vincy Lawyer, I hope! Just unfortunate that you conceal your identify behind Vincy Lawyer.
Once again you feel only you are entitled to state your OPINION!! Just like you have free will to choose to put your name, I also have that same free will to use any online name I please.
I WILL REPEAT, A WOMAN IS A WOMAN’S WORSE ENEMY. SHAME ON YOU!!!!
You see bitter. Look deep within yourself first before you attempt to “scarlet letter” other women or find fault with people’s choices of who to marry.
You sound scorn. I pity you!
Seems like you didnt make the Grade 🙂
It is clear that you are NOT a Lawyer or as someone suggested to you under a previous headline a week ago that, “you need to go back to Law school”. I have no doubt that the most you can be is a legal record searching clerk, endorsing wills and real estate straight-forward documents, surviving through others inheritances. Your diagnostic judgments are poor examples of any one associated to being close to a Lawyer.
Poor little Dreamer ‘VINCYLAWYER’!
Elma, its a good thing that personal attacks do me no harm. No matter what you want to say about me, it doesnt erase your shallow, spitting of fire from one woman to the other and disguising it as opinion.
Your article/opiniom leaves a lot to be desired. Fact: I have never had the negative feedback on anything I published. I’m a PROUD VINCENTIAN WIFE OF A VINCENTIAN HUSBAND. I’m glad neither of us were raised to think as shallow as you have and I will make sure my kids are taught differently.
I won’t go as far as using the words of Mr. David, but res ipsa locquiter.
Shame on you!!!
Wow! Who knows it best; does it best; DISGUISING! Was not aware that I was in a publishing competition with a disguiser? As you emphasize Fact: I have never had the negative feedback on anything I published.
Wow; so you were raised! great, on whose plantation at whose detriment? Great that you are forced to have your kids taught differently. Kudos to the mother of that VINCENTIAN HUSBAND who you are so very gratifying to have Peace Vincy Lawyer. Love U 2!
I wish you peace. To harbor the thoughts you hold is evident that you need peace in your own life. Some other readers said it well: xenophobic.
May you find peace. Its evident that it’s needed.
To locate this current dilemma, one would need to revert back to its ontological source. During slavery and colonialism, our women have been devalued, this is a continuous process as our men have internalized the values and morals of our colonizers. This objectification of women is also rooted in patriarchy. St.Vincent is also a very patriarchal society, just look at how many men are in government compared to women. As a Vincentian woman myself I must admit that I have been turned off by the domineering attitude of Vincentian men. We have to begin to unlearn all the sexist practices which we inherited from our colonizers. Vincentian women are your mother’s, your sisters, your aunt’s and grandmother’s. If you think that our women are not marriage quality, then you must be filled with self-hate.
Xenophobia of the worst kind.
Shame
There are also plenty of Vincentian women who marry foreign husbands. In fact I have met more foreigners married to our women than our men married to foreigners. This will certainly improve the breeding stock and take women beyond the reach of the dynasty.
When Vincentian women whisper in Kingstown you can here them in Bequia.
The SVG culture has become so political that it is almost impossible for people to see the objectivity to a simple question. Here is one of the most intelligent response to my QUESTION:>>>>>
I think it’s a good question great observation, however I think there is a simple explanation, first of all no universities in SVG well back then, most people leave at a young age for better education and during this period 4 -6 years of studies people find love, they’re not going to break up with someone they spend 4, 5 years with to come back to vincy to start a new relationship. even if it’s not in school as long as you’re not living in SVG and you find love you’re not going to break it off to come back to vincy to start over that’s nonsense , but that’s just my take on it, and in my opinion don’t think your article has anything to do with politics as some people making it out to be
The reality is there are many beautiful Vincentian women both in appearance and attitudes. Unfortunately, it is not very easy for a local man to win a Vincentian womans heart. I am speaking from my personal experiences.
As handsome, well paid and well groom as I am I have had difficulties finding a nice Vincentian woman. Over the years I have approached a number of Vincentian women with my usual courteous polite tone. Unfortunately, I am always greeted with this line who are you I dont know you. I am usually greeted with an immediate dismissal. Rather it should be hi how are you, whats your name, where are you from etc? Women from the urban areas in SVG think they are too good for country men.
If I were to put a man from another country in my place he would more than likely be greeted more kindly. The reality is foreign men are treated quite nicer in some Caribbean countries while local men are greeted less favorably. Foreign women are usually more entertaining to Vincentian men.
I have always said that our ladies have to become keener listeners. Dont dismiss a man because you do not know him. You might be giving up an opportunity of a life time to find a descent man. Entertain him but set your limits introvertly.
I know many Vincentian women misses out on finding descent husbands because they do not give the men an opportunity to be heard. I also do know many of our men do not carry themselves properly and drink too much rum.
I can say this unequivocally. Many Vincentian men like myself who work abroad wish we had the opportunity to find Vincentian wives. With an annual income of $200K EC you would think this would be easy. The truth is the foreign women show us a lot more love and appreciation.
I am very happy that the author raised this conversation. It is not that a Vincentian woman cant be a First Lady. It is that Vincentian women do not give their local men the light of Day. I can find twenty (20) well paid Vincentian men who wish day had Vincentian wives and who would love to have a Vincentian wife. Lets address this by starting a Vincentian dating website.
14022018 – Put simple, we can’t have the PM’s wife using the BIT** word in public.
You might as well ask why don’t men marry women from the same village or the same side of the island (Leeward vs Windward) which would be equally as silly.
A Woman is a Woman.. I’ve known too many to count of great sisters on this island who is happily married and supporting their husbands vice/versa. This woman’s op ed is the worst kind to have on this island- spreading hatred and strife instead of unifying women, especially given the efforts of the #metoo movement.
Your opinion is completely baseless, and your argument deeply flawed. You’re are tearing down women from other countries, even within our own region to ask a baseless question, then getting offended when you’re being called out for your ignorance. I join in the chorus- Shame on you! An ignorant, xenophobic person such as yourself wouldn’t even make it past a promise to marry. Your Op Ed reminds me of this statement- ” if you think education is expensive try ignorance”
Thank you!!!!
Baseless, unwarranted and simply disgusting.
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
What would happen when Cyber law prevent people from abusing others anonymously on the internet, in other words; when fraidy-cats have nowhere to hide?
The truth needs no defence!!!
…and just in case it did, it’s a good thing I can defend myself ,?
….but on a more serious note, if you see nothing, even at this point with your “opinion” (for want of a better word,) you are indeed part of the problem #weareallWOMEN
In your quest to highlight “whatever” (I am still unclear as to the point of this “essay,”) you have quite wrongly and unjustly been unfair to your own sex.
Perhaps its time for introspection!!!
Oh the Cyber Act has been promulgated and is an active law. Perhaps, you can be the second person to test it but here’s some free legal advice: ENSURE YOU HAVE A VIABLE CAUSE OF ACTION as per the Act.
The author of this article has expressed a legitimate point. I have travelled extensively across the Caribbean and I can tell you the centiments expressed by the author are the same in every other Caribbean country. Why is it that one of our ladies can’t become First Lady? While we may not necessarily agree we must respect each other’s opinion. The intermarriage among Caribbean nationals would almost make this an unachievable desire. It is in the same vain that you cannot hold political office in some Caribbean countries if you have dual nationality. The author has therefore expressed a sentimental point that must be respected by all.
This is the MOST DOTIST article on who should be first lady of a country. Firstly you CANNOT tell people who to marry. secondly, did these leaders married after they became leaders of the country. Elma , if you want to be a first lady, then make your self available for the next leader, young or old.. If he already married do a Yuggie , since you see nothing wrong with extramarital relationship, once it is not publicly known . i think you should start eyeing your candidates for the next Pm.,
This article sounds like jealousy
My condolences Peter Appollo. Great to know that youve risen! lol
Thanks for your condolences,your humour have made my day.No hard feelings, wishing you a great week..