By Kenisha Ellis
This is to the point.
In the past year, I have encountered about four women of varied ages in different settings and different social status. They opened up about situations that they were dealing with and the topic became very concerning to me that I thought I needed to put it out in the public.
These women were scared, angry, worried and felt hopeless because they had no direction on the issue. I guess as a country we are used to crimes that we can see and so when a woman speaks up about harassment, it is not given the weight or the seriousness that it deserves.
Sadly, in speaking with them, I also felt helpless because I did not know what to say or do. They had explored the necessary options and those interactions made them feel worse. In explaining to the police, they felt ashamed and unheard, also intimidated by the male police officers with whom they had to share the information.
These women mentioned that the males had a friend who wanted more and was rejected, a past sexual partner who felt it was their right to expose intimate pictures and videos for whatever reason, also a male who felt like just stalking them. These things may seem small or taken for granted by a lot of Vincentians, but these things can escalate. The norm is to victim shame or blame and not seek justice on their behalf. No one has the right to infringe on any one’s privacy and sense of security.
Stalking, including online and posting videos and pictures for revenge, took away their sense of independence and security and they were left powerless and not in control of their lives. Those acts created anxiety and ate away at their sense of self.
Women are scared in our society and it feels like there is more of that behaviour than we are willing to acknowledge. The male privilege stops women from speaking up and getting help.
To those in authority, how can we help women with these issues and how can we make them feel comfortable in coming forward to report?
I am scared for those who feel helpless and feel as if there is no way out.
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This is an article that first contains a lot of feminist comments and statement, whilst I am in agreement that men should take no as a definite answer whether they see it as a rejection or not and let the ladies or girls be.
On the contrary a woman needs to know her worth and stop stooping below standard to be accepted. 1st the dress code, let a man see your mind not the crack of your behind.
2) You know, you heard and you’ve seen others are being exposed to sending your body via social media, yet you are so ignorant enough to go and do the same thing. What do you think will come out of it?
3) Respect is paramount in all aspect, and it begins with self. If you don’t respect self, no one will respect you.
4) Integrity, you do what you do and still desire respect from someone who you give yourself to as a piece of meat? There is a difference between a male and a man. Learn.
5) A man is a visual hungry Lion, he will look at you as cunning as a Cobra and lsy wait fir your vulnerability before launching at you, women how much more you need to hear, see and know that others fall victim to this thing before you learn?
Then you say it’s my body, it’s fashion, it’s the latest style, yet you the same women desire to be wife. Lawd gawd! Who will respect you well enough to value a self devalued woman.
As a man it disgust me to see you women how you present yourself and still crying wolf. You want respect stop the mental molestation of the male man mind, so he in return can love and respect you, and also protect you.
This is also mental paedophilia to our young sons trying to become man. You teaching them promiscuity before they learn their ABC.
If these women need a fried then get a dog. It is the only friend you can depend on to protect you. Two dogs will do fine.
Don’t depend on Ralph, the police or your cell phone.